"There is still grace and beauty in the world."
When Jenny first walked in the door to Reconciliation Services in 2019, she thought it would be her only visit. “My water had been turned off for a few weeks because I was behind on bills. I was just trying to survive at the time.” After receiving help to pay her water bill, she inquired about some other needs and soon got connected to Kimberly Henderson, our Client Care Supervisor, and signed up for ongoing case management.
Jenny had gone through a very difficult divorce not long before that had caused her life to begin to crumble. In their early meetings, Kimberly asked Jenny about her passion in life and they laid out her goals: to stay in her home, to get her health back on track, and to pay some back fees so that she could get her law license renewed.
First, they paid off the water bill so that Jenny could stay in her home. Check.
Then, they tackled the medical issues. With all the difficulties surrounding the divorce and the blow it had caused to her finances, she had fallen behind on her medication to manage her insulin-dependent diabetes. Kimberly connected Jenny with the KC Medicine Cabinet, which helped her pay the bill, and she connected with a practitioner who has helped her stay on course.
Next, they moved on to her law license. Her license had been suspended because she had gotten behind on her Bar fees. The divorce had left her without any money. And the stress of the legal proceedings, including having to reveal that her husband was abusive both physically and emotionally, had left her with very little self confidence. Kimberly encouraged Jenny to advocate for herself to the Missouri Bar Association and to explain the situation.
Jenny did, and eventually the Bar waived $2300 of her $2700 fees. She paid the rest of the fees and got her license renewed. “The entire divorce process, and the way I was treated, was so disempowering. Getting my license back helped me feel like myself again. I had worked so hard to become a lawyer, and to be recognized again alongside my peers felt so good.”
Jenny and Kimberly spent hours working together each week, digging deeper and deeper into those things that were holding Jenny back. From their meetings, Jenny found a better perspective. “Kimberly is a great listener and she would always share with me honestly as a woman and working professional. She is a role model to me.” When Kimberly suggested that Jenny try out the trauma therapy at RS, she agreed.
Jenny was able to open up quickly in her first sessions with the therapist. “She respects me. And she tells me my experiences are real. Very few people understand how trauma affects every part of your life, but the therapist really helped me deal with the shame and judgement I’ve experienced.”
Jenny’s trauma traces all the way back to her childhood. She grew up in an abusive home and her mother experienced severe depression. “I didn’t have a model of someone taking care of themselves. I didn’t know what self care was.”
The RS therapist suggested some self care exercises and practices, and Jenny said their sessions made her feel less isolated and afraid. “The RS therapist is educated and can help explain the why behind what’s going on, she does more than just sympathize with me.”
Jenny had some education on trauma, as well. When she first became a lawyer, she worked in banking. But after a severe traumatic experience of her own at that time, she changed paths and became a disability rights lawyer and got a job with the Navajo nation. There she started a program for people with mental health disabilities and since then she has also worked as a lawyer in the nonprofit field.
“Had I gone to another agency and not Reconciliation Services, they may have just helped me with my initial need and sent me right back out the door. But here at RS, they know there’s so much deeper work to do before a person can get back to self sufficiency.”
Jenny Henry on her urban farm
When Jenny first started learning about trauma, she understood it as something that causes a lot of emotional pain. Through her own first hand experience of trauma and reflection on her childhood, she came to understand trauma as a hurtful or violent experience that causes damage and harm to a person on many different levels - physical, emotional and psychological - which affects their functioning and has deeper effects.
“Trauma is when you encounter evil that makes you afraid to be in the world. Trauma makes it hard to find hope because you’ve encountered evil and now you’re afraid that the world is evil and dangerous.”
As a child, when Jenny would become overwhelmed by the stress of growing up in an abusive home, she would escape into the woods to spend time in nature and to play in her treehouse. She had completely forgotten about this outlet, until one day she saw a flower at a local HyVee floral shop.
“I was completely captured by this flower. I kept thinking to myself: nature doesn’t have to be this beautiful. There’s nothing utilitarian about this level of beauty. The flower was a reminder that despite all of my pain, there is still grace and beauty in the world.”
Jenny got a part time job at the floral shop, and eventually got into growing flowers at home. Eventually, that turned into growing her own food. As she got more and more into the hobby, she thought about Kimberly’s encouragement to find her passion in life. “Gardening makes me feel healthy and complete. And I can make money from it and become self-sufficient.”
Last summer, she grew enough vegetables in her urban garden to give some away, and she started raising ducks. This year, her goal is to start selling produce and duck eggs, and to officially start her own business: Aunt Jenny's "Table of Plenty" Urban Farm & Homestead.
Eventually, Jenny would like her business to support women’s empowerment programming so that she can provide support for other women on their healing journeys. The name, Aunt Jenny's "Table of Plenty" Urban Farm & Homestead, is inspired by Psalm 23, verses that have inspired her through her healing journey: Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me, all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Jenny still comes to Reconciliation Services regularly. “I am so grateful that the team here helped me find my new mission in life.”
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Please give to Reconciliation Services today to help women like Jenny find healing and joy. Your gift of $25, $50, $100, or more will support trauma and depression therapy and the life giving services we offer to our neighbors in need. Thank you.